Do you do it all - Work, run the house, raise the children, take care of the finances, volunteer at the PTA and attend a book club? An important trend is taking place and it doesnít bode well for women. Since the 1970ís men are taking it easier, spending more time with the family and as a result are feeling happier, while women who used to be happier than men, have taken on more responsibilities and as a result feel highly stressed and less happy.
Women today rush from activity to activity with no time for rest or relaxation. They juggle an enormous amount of responsibility - but where is all of this pressure coming from? The presence of stress in our lives has become so familiar that weíre actually uncomfortable if we donít have it. The need many women feel to constantly be doing something comes from within. Itís an addiction and a dangerous one. Chronic stress is an inflammatory process for both mind and body. Inflammation begins most disease processes and exacerbates them.
We have become stress-junkies. We need the adrenalin rush of accomplishment to feel good about ourselves, ďLook what I can do. ď However, like any addiction the root cause is a lack of control, a loss of personal power and a fundamental unhappiness which avoids a confrontation with the self. And as you know, an addiction requires a bigger fix each time to keep that adrenalin rush going. The cycle is surge and crash. You feel depleted and fatigued; your immune system is compromised; you are pessimistic and irritable and worst of all, your bad mood is contagious to the family. Instead of acting like the calm assertive fixed point of a geometric compass around whom the family revolves, you are scary to behold, stressed-out.
Itís time to take back your power and turn stress into strength. If you have needed accomplishment after accomplishment to validate your self-worth, yet have never felt at peace or satisfied, itís time to reconnect with the hidden girl within and revel in the quiet, relaxing moments. I show you how in my original new book Addicted to Stress: A Woman's 7 Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life
( 9/15/ 2008, Publisher: Jossey-Bass - An imprint of John Wiley).
I wrote this book to liberate us from the endless to-do list which must end. We canít keep missing the simple truths in life while trying to be so perfect, clever and accomplished.
- Be Aware of Your Own Stress Addiction
- Reclaim Your Identity
- Learn to Become a Healthy Narcissist
- Build a Healthy Body
- Cultivate Your Sense of Fun And Humor
- Jumpstart Your Libido
- Reframe Your Thoughts
You will finally be cured, able to build up immunity to outside pressure and rediscover your true core self, the hidden, free-spirited girl within before you became a wife, a mother, a colleague at the workplace and a caregiver. Helicopter over yourself for a change and restore the balance. Smile deeply within, ďI am good enough.Ē
Debbie Mandel, MA is the author of Addicted to Stress: A Woman's 7 Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life
, Changing Habits: The Caregivers' Total Workout
and Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul,
a stress-reduction specialist, motivational speaker, a personal trainer and mind/body lecturer. She is the host of the weekly Turn On Your Inner Light Show on WGBB AM1240 in New York City , produces a weekly wellness newsletter, and has been featured on radio/ TV and print media. To learn more visit: www.turnonyourinnerlight.com